/ ►Monday, May 31, 2010 @ 10:58 PM
Screwed Chinese today ):
/ ►Wednesday, May 19, 2010 @ 11:07 PM
Hai (:
I didn't have my phone today ): Hahahaha. Don't you feel so handicapped without your phone? Okay this feels weird, I'm blogging in TKGS, waiting for MEP to start LOL lame much -.-
Got back more results today.. I guess they weren't so bad but they aren't that great either. And I think my L1R5's gonna be higher than the one after my first term, which is bad bad bad. My results are pathetic, seriously. But too bad for me my mum's gonna ignore the fact that I put in the effort. I wonder if she'll remember how I had tuition the night before my E/A Math and Science papers and how I still continued looking through my stuff although I was falling asleep. I doubt so. All she'll do is judge me based on my results and she'll screw around with my social life. LOL. (:
I really don't know what happened to me.. I mean, how could I fail my Chinese Paper 2? That's just plain bullshit. I guess the multiple choice sections pulled me down like mad, cuz I think my open-ended compre wasn't too badly done. I haven't summoned up the courage to tell my mum about my atrocious marks. I think I shall do it by balancing one subject that I failed with another that I passed. Too bad I don't even have an A or a B, that can lessen the severity of my baddd results :/ The only difference is that I passed one and I failed another. Pathetic much -.-
On a brighter note, my Lit's really been improving :D I got 20 upon 25 for one essay :D Hahaha that's a huge achievement for someone like me who's of average calibre heh :] Too bad my Island Voices pulled me down ): But well.. At least I feel a little more encouraged (:
And I'm glad you're okay nowwww :D Continue to be okay! :D Otherwise I'll be worried like no one's business (: ILY! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D -hugs-
P.S. I'll post again later, don't worry (: I just wanted to get this out. (: No cause for worry :D :D :D I'm perfectly fine :D / ►Tuesday, May 18, 2010 @ 9:27 PM Today was suckaayyeeee ._. Well, not really. Not entirely what I would deem as an ultimate disaster day (:
I wonder what my mum's holding against me. I mean, HULLO, it's not like I didn't study right?! Goodness. Is it my fault I didn't understand the dictionary meaning? Okay yeah maybe it is but whatever.
And how many times must you tell me to get ready to study? Am I not trying, can you not see it? And you contradict yourself. You tell me again and again to get ready to mug during the June hols and then you tell me you understand, 'cuz I've been having to concentrate on Chinese the past few days ._. Lame much??
Kay never mind, why am I letting you affect me so much. Why should I care?
I have people who make life so much more meaningful than you do (: Or rather, one person :D :D :D And thank you for that :D I love youuuu :D :D -hugs-
Thank you for today, baby :D Even if you feel lonely, remember that I'm always with you even if I'm not there physically (: Baby, I love you :D You are my one and only :] I love youuuuuu! :D Muackzz! :D
/ ►Sunday, May 30, 2010 @ 10:34 PM
Hallo :DIt's the day before Chinese Os and for some reason I'm not nervous.. Which isn't a good thing but it's not entirely a bad thing either :D Okay never mind. I hope I can get an A, then I won't have to take Chinese for the rest of the year whooo! :D :D
LOLZ. I was shivering in church today ): And I missed the Captain's Ball match damn! ): As well as Hong Xiang's concert. All because of something stupid called CHINESE -.- Performance class today was average.. I don't think I played that well but according to my piano teacher I played my Chopin Nocturne 'like an artist' so ya :] But my Debussy's not up to standard yet boohoo! ):
Came back kinda late and I've been cramming my mind with stupid Chinese 'ying yong wens' and 'zuo wens' -.- Lame, but necessary, unfortunately. Oh well (: Let's hope I put all that reading to good use tomorrow! :/
If not, bye and goodnight! Wish me luck people :D
I LOVE YOU! :D
Baby :D I'm so happy we have time tomorrow YAY YAY YAY! :D Hahahahaha :D I can't wait to see you tomorrow! :D I love you so much okay! :D :D :D
/ ►Saturday, May 29, 2010 @ 4:32 PM
Helloz peoplezz :D I'm feeling happy today! :D Woke up pretty early, at about 7 50 (: All by myself okay! :D Yay :D But I still think I've been extremely unproductive :P My mum went through some Chinese stuff with me in the morning and we took really long 'cuz I kept digressing (haha) and I was supposed to do another Chinese paper which I took forever to do :D But it's okay, I've finished it already! :] After I get off the computer I have to do Math ): Oh well. I've got to get used to mugging for the whole June holidays.. BUT. I'm going shopping too YAYYYY! :D :D :D I can't wait! :D
I'm sorry.
/ ►Thursday, May 27, 2010 @ 10:47 PM
ARGH.I woke up like, early today -.- Went for PTM in school and it took like, forever ugh. And all my mum did was talk about my faults/flaws (as usual -.-) and go on and on about me. Seriously. Nag, nag, nag. You think I don't know there isn't much time left? You think I'm daft? Hell no. How many times did you do that today? And, must you go about broadcasting how bad my L1R5 is?! Do you know how it feels?! Do you remember how Mrs Chee asked me if I was okay? You know why? You should've seen my face. People say my face is expressive. Well, I guess that's true.
Don't blame me for flaring up at you occasionally. You should be happy that I didn't stay angry at you. If not I'd have every right to still be angry at you, although I might have been smiling when Chee Hoe was leaving.
Oh well (: Since I've already got that out, it's time to post about more.. positive things? My teachers all say I have the potential (: It's time for me to bring that out yo! :D Hahahha. I hope I can discipline myself during the June holidays and make full use of it :]
Bye peoplezz! :D
Baby (: Thank you for giving me another chance. I love you so much baby, I promise you I will try my best to be more aware (: I love you -hugs- :D
/ ►Wednesday, May 26, 2010 @ 10:47 PM
I'm confused.I realize I am the cause of so many problems. So much so that I've had to make you force yourself into doing something that's so hard. Emotionally, psychologically and physically. Each time I tell you I'm going to change, I disappoint. I guess all I'm good for is disappointing eh? Since it happens every single time. Sigh.
And when you change for me, I'm not happy. Why? Because for my own selfish reasons, I hate it when you're down. What's wrong with me? Shouldn't I be happy? No, I guess not. Because as much as you changing for me supposedly makes things better, I feel guilty now. No, I'm not blaming you. It's just my guilty conscience acting up.
I hope we can weather this through together. I want to be happy, I want you to be happy, and most importantly I want us to be happy. Thank you for all you've done for me, it's time for me to do some self-reflection. For our sake.
I'm exhausted and I need to rest. I need to stop being so childish. Stop being so selfish, unaware, oblivious etc.
Goodbye.
/ ►Tuesday, May 25, 2010 @ 10:46 PM
I was told to edit my post so I shall :DI'm glad we resolved our problems yay! :D Hahahah (: Anywayz. I have to go soon so this is a short one (: I LOVE YOU! :D
/ ►Monday, May 24, 2010 @ 9:57 PM
The past few days have been exhausting.. Haha. Been frowning a lot lately too, but I guess that's just me. Or maybe my fatigue's catching up with me. Or maybe it's just the onslaught of everything. The Os looming, coming ever nearer, and me being barely prepared for it. I keep thinking of how soon the Os are and yet I can't force myself to study. OMG what the heck is wrong with me -.-
The ulcer on my lip is getting better but hey, I have a throat infection yay! -.- And I might not be able to go see a doctor tomorrow.. But frankly speaking, I don't care anymore. Because I'm troubled. And the problem's much more important than something as stupid as a throat infection. Sigh.
Goodbye.
/ ►Sunday, May 23, 2010 @ 10:49 PM
Hai :DChurch today was um, okay.. I didn't teach as I was supposed to (extra stress gahh!), which means that I'll have to teach next week and Kenneth gets an extra week off! No fair ): Hahahah (:
Had a pretty long discussion about church stuff over dinner.. Hah :]
My ulcer(s) are killing me... ): The one on my lip is mad painful and it's swollen and it makes me not want to drink water which makes my lips become dry and chapped and it makes me want to peel it. LOL (: I think I've another one in my throat. It's either an ulcer or I've got a throat infection. But then again, if I was afflicted with the latter I'd be running a fever now so I guess not. (:
Hmm.. I said I wanted to blog but I'm too busy doing other thing so I'll let this be a botched blog post! Bye! :D
Goodnight (: It's back to the fray again, tomorrow -.- SCHOOL SUCKS (:
Baby I love you and I will love you forever :D Don't ever feel like I'm loving you less or that I don't love you anymore, 'cuz that's never going to happen. Baby, I love you :D -hugs-
/ ►Thursday, May 20, 2010 @ 10:39 PM
Hmm. A number of things to blog about (: Let's blog about the generic stuff before we get down to the nasty bit (: Hahahaha. My ulcer's making my lip swell.. ._. Which is totally lame HAHA hopefully it doesn't get too obvious otherwise I'll look weeeirrddd :D And I got B3 for Physics which is better than I expected since it's 2 marks away from an A2.. Which is kind of like, a waste but still an achievement :] Okay incongruous much :DAway from the smileys.
Hello, strangers. What's up with you people? Look. Just because you don't like someone you're gonna try your best to brainwash and influence even the teachers, in a vain attempt to sway them? I think the teachers have more sense than to listen to your childish prattling. Right? Haha. You have to agree, 'cuz that's the truth (: Unless you think otherwise, I have nothing to say to you.
And Siu Yen. You said you hate me for being so blind, how about I hate you for being so childish? Hmm? Or maybe it will all come down to you being blind too, only in another sense. Do you wanna know my reasons for saying whatever I've just said? Here they are. Firstly. I sent you a text asking you if you were going to sever all ties with me just because I did something you/you guys deem as a mistake. You didn't even bother replying, that was real polite of you (: So much for being mature. And, wanna know why I think you're blind? He's changed, it's not that he hasn't. It's just that y'all are sooo fixated on your disillusioned thoughts that you don't see the effort he's making to change. He has changed, whether you like it or not. LEARN TO ACCEPT IT. You're not always right, stop thinking that way. Or rather, you just refuse to admit that he's changed 'cuz once you acknowledge the fact, hey, you're gonna lose face right? LOL.
I guess all those words you said to me about 'truckloads of love' and whatnot were plainly all lies eh? No, there's no need to clarify that I figured that out myself, I'm not that stupid thank you (: No need to even try redeeming yourself either (: Oh wait, you're too far gone to even think about redeeming yourself heh.
I think after reading this post you guys will just hate me like 200% or something, but too bad, it's the truth. So, accept it or not. (: I think I shall disassociate myself from you guys from now onwards.
Okay I think I've said enough. (: You can choose to flame me, or not. It's entirely up to you. This is just my OPINION. Yup (:
Goodnight peoplezz (:
None of this is your fault. Baby I love youuu :D -hugs- I'll be alright, I am anyway (: I love you! Goodnight dear :D
The day just got worse. Or rather, the ignorant me thought things would be just fine and dandy, but I guess not eh? Got ultra tired during MEP just now and I got into a bad mood after that, I dunno why. A sense of foreboding, maybe? Ya, I think that might be it.
After I got home I told my mum about my Math marks and I guess she was too disappointed to say anything. The good thing is, I've woken up. No more playing and slacking and being distracted and what not for me from now on. It's time to focus, I don't wanna regret.
Novia's shocked at my horrible results. That is not a good thing. I'm shocked at myself too. What's happening to me? Did I burn out? Did I lose my concentration during my papers? God knows.
We're getting back Physics tomorrow. I hope to God I'll do okay, I don't want to disappoint more people.
My ulcer's bad. My throat hurts when I swallow. I think I may be getting sick but I don't care.
Goodnight.
/ ► @ 3:01 PM
Hiieesxzxzx :DI didn't have my phone today ): Hahahaha. Don't you feel so handicapped without your phone? Okay this feels weird, I'm blogging in TKGS, waiting for MEP to start LOL lame much -.-
Got back more results today.. I guess they weren't so bad but they aren't that great either. And I think my L1R5's gonna be higher than the one after my first term, which is bad bad bad. My results are pathetic, seriously. But too bad for me my mum's gonna ignore the fact that I put in the effort. I wonder if she'll remember how I had tuition the night before my E/A Math and Science papers and how I still continued looking through my stuff although I was falling asleep. I doubt so. All she'll do is judge me based on my results and she'll screw around with my social life. LOL. (:
I really don't know what happened to me.. I mean, how could I fail my Chinese Paper 2? That's just plain bullshit. I guess the multiple choice sections pulled me down like mad, cuz I think my open-ended compre wasn't too badly done. I haven't summoned up the courage to tell my mum about my atrocious marks. I think I shall do it by balancing one subject that I failed with another that I passed. Too bad I don't even have an A or a B, that can lessen the severity of my baddd results :/ The only difference is that I passed one and I failed another. Pathetic much -.-
On a brighter note, my Lit's really been improving :D I got 20 upon 25 for one essay :D Hahaha that's a huge achievement for someone like me who's of average calibre heh :] Too bad my Island Voices pulled me down ): But well.. At least I feel a little more encouraged (:
And I'm glad you're okay nowwww :D Continue to be okay! :D Otherwise I'll be worried like no one's business (: ILY! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D -hugs-
P.S. I'll post again later, don't worry (: I just wanted to get this out. (: No cause for worry :D :D :D I'm perfectly fine :D / ►Tuesday, May 18, 2010 @ 9:27 PM Today was suckaayyeeee ._. Well, not really. Not entirely what I would deem as an ultimate disaster day (:
Or is it? I failed the 3 subjects that I got back today.. Screw my dismal marks. My mum's gonna screw me once she finds out -.- I'm so looking forward to that yay me! (: I seriously don't know what happened to me; despite all the effort I put in before the MYEs, my results don't bear testimony to my efforts. Why ):
Okay off the depressing topic! My dear is alright nowww :D And YAY so I'm very happy nowwwww :D I'm going to watch my CSI: MIAMI that I've been missing for the past 2 months (I think?) HAHAHA. And then I'm going to be a good girl and sleep :D Yay! :D ILYYYYY! :D
/ ►Monday, May 17, 2010 @ 1:15 PM
What is wrong with me, seriously. All I do is hurt people around me. Do I even make a conscious effort to improve myself? NO. What options am I left with now? God knows. I know I've called myself that countless times; what you said makes sense. It doesn't make a difference. Why am I constantly oblivious to my surroundings? Dammit. FML.
Okay never mind. Things are looking up now (: You're slightly happier and I'm happy about that (: Continue to cheer up, ILY (: AASTF, FTW! :D
/ ► @ 12:37 PM
To: Siu YenHey (: I don't really have much to say, except that I'm sorry we can't be friends again since according to Samuel you said 'she was my friend'.
All I wanna say is this. I treasure and miss all the times we had together and I wish I had them back again. Remember when I said in Italy that I think you've changed? Well, for some reason I feel that you have, I just can't put my finger on it. I don't know how.
Do you remember how, on the second day in Italy, after breakfast in the hotel in Milan, I asked if I could sit with you guys, like maybe behind you or something? Do you remember how you just absent mindedly agreed and added as an offhand remark that 'Alita and Indah were already sitting behind you'? Do you know how I felt after that? Do you know what I wanted to do? No, I guess not. You were too oblivious to my feelings. Maybe you were too caught up in the euphoric wave of being overseas with your new group of friends. Maybe you forgot all the fun we had as BFFs (almost) in lower sec. Maybe you forgot the birthday card you gave me where you wrote that 'although we might not be in the same class, we still have choir. And that I would be the SC and you'd be the Tenor SL.' And you signed off with 'truckloads of love'. What happened to all that? Were they just empty words?
I don't understand.
/ ►Monday, May 10, 2010 @ 11:04 PM
Hi. (: Screw E Math, I'm gonna fail it. All my time and effort wasted eh? And hey, guess what! If I don't manage to halve my stupid, screwed up L1R5 from last term, my social life's gonna cut by half! I mean literally HALF. Oh yay, whoop de doo. And my effort won't be taken into consideration either, so I guess I can kiss goodbye to my phone and computer time, which, by the way, is already pathetic.You tell me not to be so negative. Y tell me how NOT to. With all the shit that you give me, how am I not supposed to? I'm sorry I can't help thinking that studying is a chore. Everyone's different, y'know? I'm most definitely NOT like Dot. Not that she's a bad example, but sometimes it's just impossible to emulate others right?
And. I don't CARE if you know about me and Samuel. He's a nice guy, and too bad for you if you don't know that, you're just missing out on the important facts. Too bad for you if you don't know him. Even if you did, you wouldn't see that side of him so TOO BAD. Look, there are so many 'too bads' HAHA.
Okay whatever. My brain is saturated. Bye.
Baby.. I know all this is hard on you and I'm sorry. But please stay strong okay? We have to stay strong for each other right? Baby I love you so much, I don't want to see you like this. I love you baby, take care(: -hugs- Everything's okay, I'm here for you. I love you.
/ ►Saturday, May 8, 2010 @ 10:39 PM
For some reason I'm super tired although I slept for like, 8 hours? And my left eye's been feeling twitchy since the morning ): Which, I suppose, isn't a good thing? LOL LOL :PI took about an hour to read a couple of pages of Mrs Poon's Literature notes which I gave up on halfway (: OMG I seriously hate unproductive days!!!!! ): ): Why am I so tired ._. I was falling asleep doing my Chinese comprehension just now HAHAHA lame much.
Hmm (: I don't wanna blog anymore, msn's so busy :D Plus I'm uploading pictures on FB so I don't wanna risk hampering the upload since the uploads always take eons -.- Hahahahah! Goodnight (:
Baby today was awesome :D :D :D Baby I love you so muchh :D Don't ever blame yourself for anything if there's no need to :D Baby I LOVE YOU :D
I love the things you do (: / ►Friday, May 7, 2010 @ 10:30 PM
Hai :DMYEs have been pretty evenly 'split', if you ask me (: English was kinda hard, actually. But Chinese, SS and Lit were okayy :D Well.. Actually Lit was hard in the sense that it's freakin' hard to finish the paper but hey, I managed to write like almost 2 pages for my Island Voices WHOOO! :D :D :D Hahahaha. On the down side, I couldn't finish the whole of the second question of the second part.. Sadded ): And people like Crystal Yiu were like, three-quarters of the page when I was still at the top quarter of the paper LOL LOL. How lame (:
A Math was half killer half do-able (: Hopefully it'll balance out and give me some reasonable marks in the end LOL. All I can do is hope for the best.. Physics was easier than I thought (or maybe it was hard, just that my warped judgment is telling me otherwise ._.)
I think I screwed my practicals today ): Dammit! Hahahaha those are the areas where we're supposed to score and I can't! ): Hahahaha. And Geography.. Hahah, needless to say, I'm gonna screw it (: Right people, right? :D Yay!
I've gotta start mugging Literature from tomorrow onwards, among other subjects :/ I don't know my text well enough!!!! Argh. I feel very um, slack, for some reason haha! Is that supposed to be goood? I dunno mansxzxzx. (: But I just had tuition, so that's a small comfort :D I'm going to have an early night tonight, since I must be guai right? :D
Goodnight peoplesxzx (: Sorry for the rather disjointed post! Persevere for the last week of MYEs! After that we can KICK ASS :D :D :D
Bye! :D
Babyyyy :D We will last foreverrr :D I love you so muchhhhh! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D Goodnight and MUACKZ :D
/ ►Monday, May 3, 2010 @ 10:25 PM
Today was horrible -.- Or rather, only the first 3/4 of the day HAHAHA. I spent hours trying to complete a simple Comprehension and Summary.. Tsk. How unproductive. I'm still tired despite sleeping at 12 plus but getting to wake up at 9 instead :P Hahahahah lame much. MYEs start tomorrow!!! OMG OMG OMG OMG GG-FIED TTM ): ): ): I'm wondering. I have 3 subjects on Wednesday and no matter how long I look at the exam schedule for, I don't feel nervous. I have Chinese, SS and Lit on Wednesday. WHY AM I NOT SCARED?? Perhaps there's just something wrong with me; maybe I've been slacking for too long, so much so that I'm immune to exam stress and even the prospect of MYEs starting tomorrow. Do you think so? I feel so unprepared. And yet, I feel perfectly calm; the only thing I feel is reluctance to even start studying. Is there really a reason for feeling this way? I think it's just me. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME.
I need help. I'm going to have hardcore tuition on Wednesday LOL. Math at 4 30 which ends at 6. Science (Physics) from 8 to goodness knows what time. ._. Sigh.. SCREW PHYSICS LAA. Why must we learn Physics? Seriously. Who would wanna learn about the concept of free falling and what not? If I had a choice, I'd be content just knowing that people accelerate when they fall due to gravity, nothing more, nothing less, TYVM.
Argh. Have to stop ranting. Gonna continue studying SS later; mind-mapping ftw -.-
Byezz (:
Baby. I'm sorry for being so selfish.. Please don't blame yourself (: I love you so much baby, you want me to be happy right? Then you have to be happy first. Promise me that, and I'll promise you my happiness. I LOVE YOU BABY :]
/ ►Sunday, May 2, 2010 @ 10:56 PM
I NEED A HAIRCUT VERY VERY BADLY ): I think I'm going to get one tomorrow YAY! :D Hahahaha my stupid fringe is currently making me tilt my head to one side like a retard HHAHHA.I feel so unproductive ): I've been trying to study Literature for like hours on end but um, apparently I can't remember anything. Or maybe I just feel like I can't quite remember things; maybe I've actually already internalized them without knowing it. Hahaha okay quit rambling :P
Ahhh (: I'm too distracted (not in the bad way) to blog properly :D Gonna continue mugging Lit after this! Bye peoplezz :D
Baby I'm sorry for 'hiding' things from you. I promise I will tell you everything from now onwards, but you have to believe me when I say it's okay. I love you so much baby you're my everything :D
/ ►Saturday, May 1, 2010 @ 5:42 PM
Knocked out by 11 plus plus last night (: Hahaha.. Ah screw it whatever. Bye.